1) Santa and Banta Singh rob a bank and mess it up, managing to escape with two sacks that they find on the floor. And they take one sack each. After awhile they meet again and one asks the other, 'What did you find in your sack?'
'Ten lakh Rupees!'
'Wow... that's a lot! What did you do with the cash?'
'I bought a house. How about your sack?'
'Bah... it was full of bills.'
'And what did you do with them?'
'Eh, well... little by little, I'm paying them off...'
2) Little Lalloo was eating breakfast one morning and got to thinking about things. 'Mommy, mommy, why has daddy got so few hairs on his head?' he asked his mother.
'He thinks a lot,' replied his mother, pleased with herself for coming up with a good answer to her husband's baldness.
Or she was until little Lalloo thought for a second and asked, 'So why do you have so much hair?'
3) One Bengali Babu went to Cannought Place in New Delhi to purchase an umbrella. He had been told in Calcutta that one could bargain for better prices in Delhi also. Bengali Baboo: How much does this umbrella cost?
Shopkeeper: Rs. 200
Bengali Babu: Can I have it for Rs. 100?
Shopkeeper: Ok I'll give it to you for Rs.150.
Bangali Babu: Well can I have it for Rs. 75 then?
Shopkeeper: OK, take it for Rs. 100.
Bangali Babu: Can I have it for Rs. 50?
Ths shopkeeper is pretty angry now: Why don't you take it for free??!!
Bengali Babu: OK, can I have two of them?
4) Early one morning, a mother went in to wake up her son. 'Wake up, son. It's time to go to school!'
'But why, Mom? I don't want to go.'
'Give me two reasons why you don't want to go.'
'Well, the kids hate me for one, and the teachers hate me, too!'
'Oh, that's no reason not to go to school. Come on now and get ready.'
'Give me two reasons why I should go to school.'
'Well, for one, you're 52 years old. And for another, you're the Principal!'
5) Once Santa and Banta happened to be together in Delhi. Having excursion tickets, they boarded a DTC double decker. Banta, finding no vacant seat in the lower deck, went to the upper deck and took a seat.
He was surprised to see that there was no driver in the upper deck. Showing his anxiety, he asked Santa if there was a driver in the lower deck.
Promptly came the reply that there was indeed a driver.
Banta than said, 'Utte te wahe guru challanda pia hia!' (God is driving this upper deck himself).
6) Santa Singh spoke frantically into the phone, 'My wife is pregnant and her contractions are only two minutes apart!'
'Is this her first child?' the doctor asked.
'No, you idiot!' Santa shouted. 'This is her husband!'
